You know, this week has been HARD. Its been such a struggle for me this week to be focused, and have desire, and overcome self consciousness... seriously. It is such a struggle.
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| pretty much the only picture I took this week. haha its beautiful though, right? |
On wednesday we
had a great zone training on not gossiping. I can't lie, i've done my
fair share of gossiping, not like the back bitting that you all are
thinking of... but just the talking negative about an area or a ward...
etc. I had already been working on trying not to do that, its all part
of my monthly humility goal... and That training was just so inspired!
we were also trained on not leaving an appointment until we have shared
something from the scriptures. Often times we just use the pamphlets and
such, but the word of God is so much more effective. It was great.
The next day we had Sister Delos Santos' follow up
training with president. It was amazing how the training that ALL the
missionaries received just the day before went in one ear and out the
other. I think that was one of my tests of not gossiping. And when I was
in a conversation that that was happening I just left and went and
talked to someone else. It was hard for me, because naturally you want
to know and you compare and all those natural man things. but I really
don't want to be like that anymore. So I am trying so hard.
But, one funny thing that I noticed... the
Philippines is probably the only place where is it okay to be barefoot
at the mission home. (: haha Thats just the culture. (:
Later
that day we went to one of our farther out areas and one of the
members, she is awesome, she always feeds us... you'll never guess what
she wanted us to eat.... ANd of course I forgot my camera.... Manok
tiil. Or....CHICKEN FEET. I was so scared. I didn't eat it. she just
laughed and then let me eat a hot dog, but my companion was sure chowin
down! It was probably the most gross thing I have ever seen. I will
take my camera next time and get a picure(:
So, last night we taught the Castillio family. I
love this family sooo much!!! They are just so great, but they have
rejected the baptismal invitation 2 times now. And Brother is kinda the
leader of the pack... and when he has doubt they all have doubt. The
other night in his closing prayer he asked that they will know the right
decision... and so me and Sister Delos Santos decided that we would
watch the restoration with them. So that is what we did, last night,.
THey pulled a tv out of their house and we all sat outside and watched
the restoration in tagalog... I coulsn't help but cry. It was so
powerful, and it meant so much to me, in a different language.. that I
can barely understand.
But it was amazing, the movie answered every question that Brother had asked us last time. it was so inspired.
The whole time I was praying that their hearts would be softened and that they would feel the truth and that they would know.
after the movie my companion and I bore testimony of
the truthfullness of the gospel and that Joseph smith was a true
prophet... and how important it is for us to know for ourselves.
I don't know the ending to the story yet... but I do know that that
movie had a powerful effect on them, I could feel it, and I know they
could feel it.
This past week I have been
thinking alot about the early saints and about Joseph Smith. There are
so many things that I want to ask them, to ask HIM. I am so thankful for
him...
This morning I was reading in Doctrine and covenants
121. Joseph Smith is in Liberty jail at this point and he feels like
the Lord has abandon him, in short. So he is writing telling him how he
feels and it is amazing the Lords response.
He says ...
7 My son, apeace be unto thy soul; thine badversity and thine afflictions shall be but a csmall moment;
8 And then, if thou aendure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy bfoes.
Then he compares him to Job in the Bible...
9 Thy afriends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands.
10 Thou art not yet as Job; thy afriends do not contend against thee, neither charge thee with transgression, as they did Job.
11 And they who do charge thee with transgression, their hope shall be blasted, and their prospects shall amelt away as the hoar frost melteth before the burning rays of the rising sun;
12 And also that God hath set his hand and seal to change theatimes and seasons, and to blind their bminds, that they may not understand his cmarvelous workings; that he may dprove them also and take them in their own craftiness;
And...
you know what? I was talking to my companion about it... THis week I
have been thinking a lot about the first saints and I watched the joseph
smith movie and legacy in my spare moments.... and I was thinking about
my own trek experience. and then I was thinking about my life now and
how i'm just struggling this week....
I
thought about Bishop Hall and how he basically forced me to go on the
trek... but how grateful I am now that he told me to go. Why? becasue I
know how to endure. I walked with blistered feet for ever it seemed, and
I was dirty and tired and i pulled a heavy wagon...
its
kinda the same as a misisonary, I have blisters on my feet, I have to
talk to people in a scary intimidating language, I am sweaty and tired, I
have a bag full of book of mormon and pamphlet that weigh on my
shoulders...
Then
it hit me. Joseph Smith, a man that I look up to so much and the first
saints... if they could endure it well.... and they went through so much
more than I ever will... then I can endure it.
But
even more than that, more importantly then The prophet and the
pioneers, someone even greater, even Jesus Christ, endured more than I
will ever have to.. because he did it for me, and for all of you and
everyone that will ever come to the earth...
I
can endure because he endured for me. He did the will of the Father, so
I can do his will Here... even with the hot sun on me, even if I have a
mean companion, which I don't, but if i did.... Even If I just want to
give up... I can endure. I can do this..
I
am SO thankful for Joseph Smith.. I can't even describe on paper how
thankful I am for him... and take that and mulitply it by a billion and
that is how thankful I am to Jesus Christ.
I
know that life at home, where you are all at is hard.. . There is
death, there is mean family members, there are snobby co=workers, there
are crazy drivers, there are obnoxious children, there are ... the list
goes on and on.... but I know that you can endure it well.
Life
on the mission is much the same. We get rejected, and yelled at, made
fun of, cut off, chased away, but no matter how bad it breaks my
heart.... because i love them... I really do. I can endure it through
the Atonement.
The atonement is powerful and real, and I urge you all to try it. it will change you.
So yeah, it was one of those weeks, but I have a new outlook on life... I
have a christ-like outlook on life. And I am ready to endure things
well!!
have a great week everyone.
Love, your sister missionary.
Sister YOung
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